Things That Amuse Me

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Oldy but a goody:

An officer from the Drug Enforcement Administration stopped at a ranch in Texas, and talked with an old rancher. He informed the rancher, "I need to inspect your ranch for illegally grown drugs. The rancher said, "Okay, but don't go in that field over there," as he pointed out a distant location.

The DEA officer verbally exploded, " Mister, I have the authority of the Federal Government behind me!" Reaching into his rear pants pocket, he removed his badge and proudly displayed it to the rancher.

"See this badge?! This badge means I am allowed to go wherever I wish – on ANY U.S. land!! Have I made myself clear. Do you understand???"
The rancher nodded politely, apologized, and went about his chores.
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A short time later, the old rancher heard loud screams, looked up and saw the DEA officer running for his life, being chased by the rancher's enormous Santa Gertrudis bull.
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With every step the bull was gaining ground on the officer, and it seemed likely that the officer would be gruesomely gored before he reached safety. The man was clearly terrified.
The rancher threw down his tools, ran to the fence and yelled at the top of his lungs,

"Your badge, show him your Damn BADGE!!"
 

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Oldy but a goody:

An officer from the Drug Enforcement Administration stopped at a ranch in Texas, and talked with an old rancher. He informed the rancher, "I need to inspect your ranch for illegally grown drugs. The rancher said, "Okay, but don't go in that field over there," as he pointed out a distant location.

The DEA officer verbally exploded, " Mister, I have the authority of the Federal Government behind me!" Reaching into his rear pants pocket, he removed his badge and proudly displayed it to the rancher.

"See this badge?! This badge means I am allowed to go wherever I wish – on ANY U.S. land!! Have I made myself clear. Do you understand???"
The rancher nodded politely, apologized, and went about his chores.
View attachment 7927
A short time later, the old rancher heard loud screams, looked up and saw the DEA officer running for his life, being chased by the rancher's enormous Santa Gertrudis bull.
View attachment 7928
With every step the bull was gaining ground on the officer, and it seemed likely that the officer would be gruesomely gored before he reached safety. The man was clearly terrified.
The rancher threw down his tools, ran to the fence and yelled at the top of his lungs,

"Your badge, show him your Damn BADG
One of my favorites!
 
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